Don’t Wait on Life
Has anyone found themselves in deep thought while sitting on the phone with tech support? Over and over again, I thought of things I could have done while I sat there waiting doing nothing. There is a difference between having life and living. A rose, no matter its beauty, has much life, but does absolutely no living.
Is Your Life on Hold?
Are you waiting on some sort of Gary V motivational rant to get your self organized? Are you waiting for a husband or wife to come along, or for them to act better towards you? Are you waiting on a great job to fall into your lap? Are you waiting on winning the lottery before you actually start living a good life? Stop waiting on your life! The only difference between you and the people who are getting what they want, is that they keep it moving and you are not. Here are some ideas to help get you started again.
Focus on the who, not the what.
If you find that you’ve been stuck in a goal for a while, try restating it in “who am I” terms instead of “what I want” terms. For example, instead of saying “I want to lose 30 lbs.”, say “I am someone who takes care of themselves by keeping my weight around “X”amount of pounds, which is a healthy range for where I am currently.” Be as specific as possible. Notice that “I want to be someone who helps others” could mean anything from a clerk in the grocery store to a heart surgeon. Focus on who you want to be. Then ask yourself what actions can you take that would better align with your desire “to be” instead of “to get”.
Analyze It.
Did you know that around 80% of your problems come from 20% of your life? This has been extensively studied, so determine what that 20% is that’s affecting so much of your life, and start working to make it happier, more efficient, more satisfying.
Assign Value.
From personal experience, I am noticing that a big problem is not assigning true value to your time, your energy, your money and more importantly to the “real estate” the wrong thoughts take up in your mind. Realize that for each thing you say Yes to, from a pair of shoes to watching a movie you, have said No to something else. Always ask yourself, is this worth me crowding my mind and life with? Do I really want to bump something else from my closet, my schedule, my money?
Establish Routines.
I know you have “Netflix And Chill Night”, so why not have a “set my to do list night” or “relax my mind night” as well? Just like your assigned relax Netflix time, routines show up in all kinds of ways in our life. While they sound boring and confining, routines are actually freeing. The same way you don’t have to think what you’re going to be doing on Netflix Night, how about instead of being worried and anxious on Monday morning wondering if you remembered to pay the car insurance over the weekend, you can feel calm knowing that you always go to the bank on Friday afternoon and pay bills on Wednesday evening. Routines take the excess stress and worry out of what could otherwise be worrisome chores.
Accept Control-Ability.
We’ve all heard about deniability from political spin doctors. Well let me introduce the concept of controllability in your daily life. You can’t control world politics, but you can vote. You can’t control the forces at work, but you can be prepared in your own mind, not to let them affect you. You can’t control the construction crews on the freeway, but you can control how well you plan your routes. Knowing what you can control and exercising that, and letting go of what you can’t, puts you in the driver’s seat of your life.
The End Goal
Feeling good about yourself will come naturally when you stop waiting and start creating the life you really want to live. Stress and frustration will be reduced as you make choices instead of frantically reacting to your surroundings. You’ll experience a higher sense of self acceptance, and self improvement will become easier and easier.